Each year fifty million people care for parents, spouses, or family members who are frail or disabled. Often these caregivers assume the time spent tending the senior will be temporary. The average time consumed by caring for an adult relative is typically around eight years. Family members are typically overwhelmed by providing adequate care and experience a sense of guilt that they must continue in whatever manner possible. The caregiver inevitably experiences stress.
There are various ways to achieve calm while assuring the senior is receiving appropriate care. Here are some important things to remember:
- Breathe deeply from your belly→ this will improve oxygen circulation; eliminating toxins
- Drink plenty of water→ this will hydrate your body; improving elasticity of muscles and tissues
- Wear comfortable clothing in soothing colors
- Listen to calming music that makes you feel good
- Learn to hug and freely accept hugs→ this simple act lowers blood pressure, decreases stress hormones and increases serotonin (a feel good chemical secreted by the brain)
- Ask for help and accept offers of help
- Laugh→ a major stress reducer; lowers blood pressure, oxygenates the blood, relieves pain, increases serotonin, helps you sleep soundly
There are also people in your community who provide services to help you care for you elder family member. There are programs that will help you remain active in the workplace, allow you take time for yourself, experience better marital and family communication, and help you to enjoy the time you spend with your family member. Some of these programs include:
- Adult Day Services→ Day long programs that typically include van transportation, nursing management, therapeutic recreation, personal care, meals, hair styling and podiatry
- Home Care Agencies→ Visiting nursing services for medical necessity, home health aides, homemakers, and physical therapy
- Social Service Agencies→ Provide guidance for navigating services and funds available in the community
These are just a few services available but each can help guide you to make the best choice for your situation.
The American Medical Association developed a self-assessment questionnaire to determine caregiver stress. Sometime’s caregiver’s lose sight of their own well-being but these questions should give some insight.
During the past week or so, I have:
- Kept my mind on what I was doing.
- Felt I couldn’t leave my relative alone.
- Had difficulty making decisions.
- Felt completely overwhelmed.
- Felt useful and needed.
- Felt lonely.
- Been upset that my relative has changed so much.
- Felt loss of privacy and personal time.
- Been edgy or irritable.
- Had sleep disturbed because of caring for my relative.
- Had a crying spell.
- Felt strained between work and family responsibility.
- Had back pain.
- Felt ill.
- Been satisfied with my family’s support.
- Found their living situation to be a barrier to care.
To calculate the score:
Reverse the score for # 5 & #15 (for example if the response was no, change it to a yes.)
Calculate the number of “yes” scores.
- If you answered “yes” to 10 or more questions or
- If you answered “yes” to questions 4 and 11;
- Chances are you are experiencing a high level of stress.
What should you do next?
- Consider making an appointment with your doctor to get a check-up for yourself.
- Consider joining a support group.
- Consider talking with someone at a local service agency.
- Consider some of the stress relieving techniques mentioned at the beginning of the article.
Keep in mind that about one in four American families care for someone over fifty. So you are not alone. There are people in your community providing services to support caregivers; give one of them a call.
- UCFS Eldercare Services 889-1252
- Senior Resources
- Home Care Agencies